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Family Life

Like Snowflakes, No Two the Same

Shari McStay


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I peek into my twin boys’ bedroom to see if they are awake.

Seeing the two beds made instantly confirms that they are up. I pause a moment, noticing the glaring difference. One neatly made, one barely made.

I thank both boys for making their beds. I won’t say anything in front of them about how they are done or compare the way in which they are done. I appreciate that they made the effort and also believe that each one has done his best.

The boys are fraternal twins and they are so very different, yet so close. Different interests, different friends, and they attend different schools.

Each boy with his own unique personality, strengths and passions.

Children, like snowflakes, share a similar makeup and yet no two are exactly the same. Born to the same parents and sharing genes, yet exposed to different conditions and outside influences in places such as school, clubs, sports activities and visits to friends’ homes.

Though they have their differences, just as snowflakes have some similarities, so do my sons — each one kind, caring, bright and family-oriented. They learn differently: one dyslexic, one not, yet each with an incredible mind and zest for learning.

Just as snowflakes change at different times, children grow, mature and learn at different times. We should have no expectations that any two should be or will be the same.

Like a beautiful, individual snowflake glistening in a snowfall, I will love and accept each child for just how they are in each moment in time.

Originally shared on CollegiateParent's Facebook page. Find more conversation and community in our College Parent Insiders Facebook group. Photo courtesy of the author.
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Shari McStay is a full-time residential real estate agent and part-time writer, with master's degrees in both business and education. She is mother of four children, one angel baby and three kitties. Shari is passionate about spending quality time with family and friends and volunteering at Sweet Paws Rescue. Fun fact: In 1995 Shari was the oldest New England Patriots cheerleader and remains active with the New England Professional Cheerleader Alumni Association. She lives in Massachusetts with her children and husband of over 25 years.
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